# My Life Got To Shit’s

**Channel:** EverythingAzaan
**Source:** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bL77toevLm0
**Transcript page:** https://www.withtranscript.ai/video/bL77toevLm0

## Chapters

- 0:00 — Early Life and Family Crisis
- 2:10 — Discovering Gym During Isolation
- 4:58 — Second Cancer Diagnosis and Gym Outlet
- 10:30 — Debt, Setbacks, and Umrah Lessons
- 18:51 — Confidence, Purpose, and Moving Forward

## Transcript

**[0:00]:** Right. So there's one thing which I want to mention and it's my life. I don't think many people know about my life. I say, like a few close people, that's it. But you don't know the full picture about me.

**[0:11]:** And I want to make this video about that. So I tell you, everything started for me when I was 16. Before that, I was a very, very troublesome kid. I would always cause issues and I was the type of kid to just be very naughty. And I'd say my biggest ever reality check was when it's four days before my birthday, my mom was diagnosed with cancer. It was mock season. It was mock season for GCSEs. I'm a Covid baby. And yeah, I fucked my mocks up just because my mental was just all over the place. At the time my mom was diagnosed with cancer, it was blood cancer.

**[0:56]:** And I was 16. I didn't really know much to think of. I just thought cancer was a thing where it kills everyone. That's what I thought in my head. That was a very tough year for me.

**[1:09]:** Very, very tough year because it was Covid and I was a really big mom's boy prior not having my mum around because she was in the hospital fighting cancer and my dad working continuously. There was no one really there at home other than me. So that was a very lonesome chapter. But it made me have to compromise and be very independent. I learned to cook at a very young age.

**[1:46]:** I think that's helped me to this day. But I don't want to. I don't want to make it out to be like a sub story. But you need to know this part about me. You need to know why I am the way I am, why this entire thing exists, why I do what I do, how I'm mentally wired, you know, if you know this part, then you'll understand the rest of whatever videos I make.

**[2:10]:** So, yeah, when it came to Covid time, of course everyone knows you had to go ahead and just stay isolated at home. There was not really much to do. And I was getting bored as fuck. I was getting bored as fuck, had nothing to do. And then I just looked at like gym videos. And there was this. There was this one guy. This has nothing to do with gym, by the way. Guava juice. I would watch him religiously. Alex Wasabi, Sidemen, Beta Squad, all of them. I used to watch. What? I used to watch YouTube religiously. And it was just one video which I saw.

**[2:48]:** I don't know who it was, but I Was just like, whoa. And then I was like, I want to start training, I wanted to start going to the gym. But of course I couldn't go gym. So what I did was I went and got rice, I had these big packets of rice. So what I did was I got them, I put them in bags and I started using them as dumbbells. That was my way of weights at the time. And with them being weights, I used to get a little buzz of like, yeah, I'm lifting, that's me, I'm doing that. And I remember when I first saw my first striation on my shoulder, I was so happy, I was so happy. And from that point onwards I got obsessed. From a very young age, came to towards 17.

**[3:40]:** I then stepped into the gym because Covid restrictions had died down a little bit. So I stepped into a gym, I went to the gym group. I met quite lovely few bunch of people at the time and they helped me understand the gym because I was very, very, very. As soon as I stepped in, everything that I knew at home, which I was doing it, I just forgot it was a new area, new scenery. I remember I walked in, I was panicking, I was scared shitless because I was just looking around, I'm like, there's people staring at me, I don't know what to do.

**[4:21]:** Luckily there was a guy there which I knew and I went up to him and I was like, I don't know what it is I'm supposed to be doing. And then he guided me through the first workout and after that I was a little bit more confident in myself, I could work out. And noticed bit by bit no one was really staring at me, it was just me in my own head and started loving the gym. And I was going like six times a week. That one day where I had a rest day, I was dreading it.

**[4:51]:** My mum had. My mum had beaten cancer for the first time.

**[4:58]:** And then things were going well. I then came towards 18, I was really, really broke. I had no money to my name.

**[5:08]:** I was just going gym, that's it. I had nothing else I was doing and I really needed a job. So then I was scouting around and then I went and started working at Zara Trafford Center. And then when I was working at Zara it was okay for the first year because I was making money. I was like, whoa, I'm making so much money. It was a grand. But at the time because, because it was a first time job and I had never got that much money before, I was like, whoa. And yeah, it Was okay. And then once I started to get it more and my bills increased and whatnot, bit by bit, I was like, a grand is not a lot. A grand is not a lot.

**[5:53]:** And then when I had just turned 19, my mom was diagnosed with cancer again. This time it was brain cancer. That one hit me the most because.

**[6:12]:** I genuinely thought she wasn't going to survive that. I. I thought she was going to go. And I remember sitting at my nannel's house, and everyone was just like, oh. Upset. And I didn't know as to why.

**[6:35]:** I walked into the room and everyone just looked at me and they said, sit down. I sat and they said, look, your mom's got cancer again. I was like, which one? And they said, it's brain cancer and legit. The first thing which came to my mind was, is she going to die?

**[7:05]:** So I said it out loud, and they were like, we don't know. So I was shaking. I didn't want to lose my mum, of course. And then as soon as I was told this, my mom called straight away. She was in the hospital.

**[7:22]:** She called me, and I was shaky. My family said, don't say anything. She doesn't know yet. So I picked up the phone. I was like, salaam, beta. Hope you're okay. That means, hello, son. How are you? I'm like, I'm okay, Mum. I'm trying my best not to break down here.

**[7:46]:** And, yeah, she was like, yeah, I'm only gonna be here for a few more days, and then I'll be back home. Prior to her going to the hospital, we had an argument, as any family would. And after that, I didn't see her. She went straight to the hospital. So I kind of felt a little bit guilty as well.

**[8:14]:** And then I knew the actual reality. My mom didn't.

**[8:23]:** So when I was hearing her voice the way how it sounded so innocent and, like, motivated, like, I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna be coming home soon.

**[8:37]:** Nearly made me break down. And I couldn't hack it. I couldn't hack it. So I left the room. I stepped outside.

**[8:45]:** I remember my uncle was coming home from work, and I ended a call. Put it down before she. Before I ended it. She said, don't worry. I'm gonna be okay, and I'll be home very soon.

**[9:01]:** In my head, I was like, I hope. I hope you are. But a part of me thought, like, she isn't. My uncle came and was like, come inside. I pushed him away.

**[9:14]:** I broke down completely. I started crying my eyes out. Crying My eyes out. It reminded me of the time when I was 16 and I was crying my eyes out then at that time, 16, I was like, you know how it's like when you're a kid, right? You don't really think about what it is.

**[9:31]:** You don't really think of the outcome. You just think of what's in the moment. So I bought my eyes out when I was 16, then when I was 19 and this happened again. But this time I had a bit of sense and hearing. That was brain cancer, bro. That broke me down, broke me the fuck down. And yeah, I started the dialing into gym a lot more then because, bro, I needed that outlet. I needed that outlet. I had nothing to do with, like, let myself out. If I didn't, I would have went insane going through that situation, especially alone.

**[10:17]:** It's hard, bro. It's so hard. Like, I needed something. I needed an outlet. So the gym, which I had built into my life, became everything to me.

**[10:27]:** It was my way of letting everything out.

**[10:30]:** And I continued, continued. I continued going 19, 20. My mum went through remission. Alhamdulillah.

**[10:40]:** She's okay now. She's stable. But of course, brain cancer is going to alter. It's going to change anyone. We.

**[10:47]:** We all know this. It's going to change someone which has it in some type of way. So I experienced those changes from, like, how she was prior to how she was. Like now I noticed that. But I'd say the one thing like how I mentioned was I was a big mom's boy. Big, big mom's boy. And because it. Because of the whole situation, it made me very independent. And I then started to see as well that the world we live in, it's not going to be able to hack, like a job. I don't see.

**[11:31]:** I don't see the. I don't see the benefit of it. If I'm being honest, I think uni is stupid. Some may disagree. And I hope for you guys your journey is blissful. I hope there's no issues whatsoever. I hope it's a. It's the best journey of your lives. But for me and what it is that I aspire to build, become, I was just like, this is not it. And especially with the life problems I had at the time, I was like, no, I don't want to be doing this.

**[12:02]:** So 19, I dropped out. I dropped out of uni. I legit dropped out. And I was like, right, okay, I want to figure out what I want to be doing. I had no direction. I just Dropped out. And then I was like, right, what's the one thing I'm good at? Fitness. So I started looking into it more, seeing what I could do to better a person's life, my own life especially. And I saw that I am very good at getting myself in shape. And I had a friend called Ahmed. I got him in shape in three months. Prior to this, this guy had been training with so many people. He had been training with himself as well. He couldn't get in shape. It was like two years. And he trained with me for like two to three months. I got him big. And that was when I was like, okay, maybe you got potential in this.

**[12:52]:** I'll try trading.

**[12:53]:** Messed that up. Oh, my God. I was in debt because of that.

**[12:58]:** Biggest lesson I learned from that is don't be greedy. But yeah, from 20. I'm 22 right now. From 20 to 22 was just countless hurdles of me trying to get this dream reality of myself, become the version which I aspire to be and live that rich, rich, rich life. That was my goal because I wanted to become the best, best of the best.

**[13:32]:** Little did I know that God had something else in plan for me. 21 started getting credit cards. It was like, let me max them all out. Like, let me go ahead and get as many credit cards as I can. Let me build my credit score up.

**[13:49]:** I did do that.

**[13:53]:** I started my business. My business was doing well. So I was like, okay, this is another reason as to why I should go ahead and do that. My mistake was that with the credit cards, I. I then got into a financial rut. And that rot was I. I thought if I bettered a business by getting something expensive, it would work in my favor.

**[14:21]:** It was stupid. It was a stupid mistake. And because of that stupid mistake, I maxed out all my credit cards. But. But you can't learn if you don't up in life, you know?

**[14:34]:** And I was my. I was like my second up. So when I went through this, that humbled me because I. Prior to this, my business was doing so well, and then out of nowhere, it plummeted. Got myself into 24k debt, and then I was in that rut for so many months.

**[15:02]:** So many months. I was in that rut for around about six to eight months. And I was surviving off £300 and I could barely get me anything. Now I want to tell you something very funny. I was invited to go to umrah this year.

**[15:24]:** And in that period, I was going through that financial rut. Imagine I got called to Allah's house in a period where I wasn't financially even stable. When I tell you that is a miracle in itself. That is a miracle. I didn't expect that at all.

**[15:48]:** I thought, when I make it, when I start getting money coming in, I will be invited then. I'll be able to go then. No, I got invited at my lowest point. Lowest, lowest point. And for me, money has been always the biggest factor because it, let's just be honest.

**[16:06]:** Yeah, you can, you can live on an average salary, but it doesn't really benefit you if you've got something so high that you're achieving. It's going to keep on, like playing with your head and with mine. It was doing that. Anyway, I came to Umrah and yeah, I had a lovely time there. Lovely, lovely time. I was barely surviving, but it was a very nice time. I remember food. Oh, it's so hard to get food. Like, I was, I was surviving of scraps. I would survive enough scraps. Oh, I remember I was trying to find like the cheapest, cheapest food because I needed to get something to get my food in. Like, I couldn't find anything. Oh, it was so. It was such a dreadful but peaceful time at the same time. Oh, but anyway, there was one this wonder why which I had in mind when I went to go do Umrah, I was like, allah, please, I want to get in shape.

**[17:07]:** Please help me get in shape. Now imagine after this period. Oh, no, it was another thing as well. Allah, please help me, like, like financially become stable. After this period, that 300 pound which I was making.

**[17:23]:** Yeah, gone, right. I don't know what it was after Umrah, bro, Allah tested me even more. Like, everything. I had got stripped even more. I legit was like as if I was a, like, like I was naked, naked. Everything was stripped from me. I had nothing left. And I remember the saying, there's a saying is if you've been. If you're at rock bottom, the only way is up. So after February time, when I finally accepted, I'm at rock bottom, I can't do anything if I keep soaking.

**[18:02]:** I was like, what can I actually do? Gym. Started back with a gym. And I was like, right, okay, how do I build something? Like, what do I do?

**[18:13]:** How do I get myself in shape? Assigned a client, first client in a long time. And that client practically was the reason as to why I got in shape. I was surviving off like 30 pound a week. And with that 30 pound a week, I was having salmon and rice every single day for three months. Straight. And I got in shape. I got a six pack in my lowest, lowest, lowest point of my life, surviving off scraps.

**[18:51]:** 30 pounds. People say it's the most expensive. Like, it's expensive. You have to go ahead and do so much to get in shape. No, no, no, no, no. I go in shape off scraps. And I enjoyed the scraps.

**[19:06]:** You know how I was saying? I've been chefing up since 16. Yeah, it helped with so much later on down the line, I made the most, smallest, smallest things into the best, best meals. Anyway, as soon as I started to get in shape, I started to realize, right, okay, money isn't everything. It's how I present myself. It's how I, like, show myself as a person. And I started to notice this because I have been on both sides. The fat side, the skinny fat side, the skinny side, the bulked up fat size to the in shape size. People treat me differently. No one knew I was fucking broke.

**[19:51]:** But because I was in shape, the amount of respect I gained was unbelievable. Nobody knew I was broke. Nobody knew that I was making more than four figures. I was making barely 500. And because of how I looked, people treated me so much more differently.

**[20:13]:** People looked at me differently. And that's when I realized looks is one of the most important things you need to work on in life. If you ain't got money, you work on your looks. Remember, 80% is grooming, 20% is what your genetics are. So that 80%, which you have control over, just looking after yourself, that's on you.

**[20:41]:** And that's when I learned the art of consistency. And I was like, damn, this is changing like, like my mentality a little bit. And I think that's what God was trying to teach me. I think that's why God stripped everything from me from, like, from Young, from 16, when I finally hit reality, I finally, like, like, I finally started to understand at the age of 22, after, like around about six to eight years worth of like, trouble like this. This was like working all the way to get me ready for hitting rock bottom, to help me being able to build myself up to the version which I needed to be.

**[21:22]:** So when I, when I started to see that people would treat me differently, I, because of how I looked, I was like, damn, this has changed a whole new thing. My confidence started to increase again. It didn't rely on financial. It was like before. Because I don't have money, I can't be confident.

**[21:45]:** No, I started being confident in other ways. I was confident within myself. I was confident in the fact, like, okay, if I don't have money, sorry, there's a hair in my face. If I'm, if I don't, if I, if I don't have the money, I can be confident with how I look, how I approach, how I. I'm like as a person. And that's when I realized it's so simple.

**[22:06]:** It's so, so simple. God stripped everything from me so that I could learn that and so that I don't have that mentality that this figure on a screen is what controls my life. I control my life. Not nothing, not, not anything else. I control my life.

**[22:23]:** Then I started to see, my clothes started to fit better. My, my. My face started to come in more. I started to learn how to take care of my skin, how to do my goatee correctly, how to look after my hair, found something which actually fit for me, found my style, found something which I actually love to pursue. And then I was like, that's it.

**[22:49]:** That's what I need to continue doing. And I did. And that's what made me different as a person. And that's what made my business kick off as well. Because as soon as I was confident within what I am as a person, people started to see that. I started posting that on social media. And when I did, my business started to grow. And like I said, I was stripped of everything. From being stripped to then building everything back again. Clearly it was just Allah's way of a redirection to the correct direction.

**[23:24]:** And when you've hit rock bottom, the only way is up. So all I've been doing ever since has been gradually increasing my up. And don't get me wrong, I still get my rock bottom moments. Everyone does. I'm human. You're human. But what I'm trying to say is, look, I was a kid which was 16, about to lose his mom to then being in debt. Bro, there's more to it. I just don't want to, I just don't want to say it all in this video, otherwise this video would be hours. But.

**[23:56]:** And plus my, my throat's getting a little dry, I don't have any water. So I'm trying to, I'm trying to like, give you an experience of me as the shortest form possible. But yeah, that's what I'm trying to say, bro, like a 16 year old kid barely made it out of his GCSEs, left uni, nearly lost his mum twice, got in debt, built a business, lost his business and built it back again all at the age of 22. Lost so many people along the way. Friends, family.

**[24:37]:** It's part of the journey and it's all taken me to where I am right now. And I like to believe for my age, I'm 22, I've done very well for myself. Yes, I've put myself in debt and that is okay. I don't give a shit anymore. It used to be four, but it's not a thing that affects me because I know I've seen more to it. I know that there's more that I can achieve, offer, bring to the table and I've built that. The way how I articulate my words, the way how I'm confident, the way how I look, the way how I take care of myself, the way how my body looks, the way how I can go ahead and put a T shirt on and not have to worry. The way how I sit or the way how people look at me because of how much work I've put into myself.

**[25:28]:** Because I know the experiences which I've had prior have led to this moment and that's who I am. And I'm proud of that because I did that. I went through that. No one else went through that. Many 22 year olds are in the same, same, same position probably, probably even worse. And they don't do all, they don't do all, they just take it. I took it to the chin and I worked on it and I bettered myself.

**[25:56]:** That's what made me different. I built a business out of it. I help people for a living now. I'm good at what I do. I know I'm good at it because I've helped so many people.

**[26:09]:** It's just a thing where you gotta go through in order for you to get good shit. And I had to go through that. And I'm not saying that my journey is coming through like, yeah, it's gonna be all time high now. Like, that's it. Allahu Alam. Allah knows best. But I'm learning to have more trust in the process because that's the best way to go. Live in a moment is what they say, live in the moment. And.

**[26:46]:** I've hit rock bottom, but I've been able to get myself out of rock bottom many, many times.

**[26:55]:** I'd say my overall experience on everything would be that I needed that. I needed this in order to be where I am today, in order to be this person which I'm trying to achieve. This version of which clicked and was like, right, I want to achieve this reality, but I just don't know how. And ever since then, I've been chasing that reality. And because I have been.

**[27:25]:** Yes, there has been hurdles along the way, but, bro, I still fucking. I'm here. I'm here, still breathing. God still has something for me. Clearly.

**[27:34]:** I just need to continue working towards that. Just need to continue working. And that's what I'm doing. But this experience, which I've been through in the past, I couldn't have been where I am today without it.

**[27:50]:** Yeah. So when it comes to the gym, I take it very highly because of the fact I've been through so much and it's just my way of outlets. And because of that, the proof that was just I got in shape and I was able to go ahead and make a business out of it called Pursue Us. And that Perseus business is helping multiple people go ahead and get in shape. And what it is that I'm trying to build is an ecosystem along.

**[28:16]:** Along the lines of Perseus. But I need the capital for it. And the only way to go ahead and build a capital is by going ahead and continuing making pursuers a thing where I'm helping multiple people's lives so that I can go ahead and help them get in shape, make them who they need to be, understand the version of which they can become. The way I did, the way. How I was able to build it.

**[28:48]:** So anyway, that's a bit about me. I hope you liked. I did that. I did that in a one take as well, man. Getting there. I'm learning. I'm learning and that's what I like. I've also got some. Let me show you. If. If you're listening on Spotify, you won't be able to see it, but I've got some jazz music on in the background. But yeah, Sunday, 6:00pm I hope you enjoyed. I'm waffling now, man. I'm just gonna be quiet. But yeah, anyway, Sunday, 6:00pm, everything is on.

**[29:22]:** I'm going. I. I don't know what to do with my other YouTube channels. I'm still figuring out what I want to be doing. But this I know I've solidified. The date is Sunday, 6pm so this will continue, but I'm gonna continue like the way how it's like progressively, like building up, like, you're getting to know me.

**[29:41]:** Last podcast was me introducing it back and now I'm talking about, like, me, my. My bit of a backstory. Basically. I'm going to continue building up like that because it's like a storyline. It's like a plot. It keeps you interested. It keeps you intrigued. But anyway, subscribe like and comment. Say, wow, Azan, you're amazing. Okay, I'm gonna shut up now.

**[30:06]:** Okay, take care. I'll speak to you next week. Take care. Bye. Bye.