Transcript
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A bureaucratic interview establishes the speaker's occupation as a gladiator and checks whether he has killed or tried to kill recently. The exchange ends with a warning about his unemployment status and a request for signs.
Speaker A
Here.
Speaker B
Occupation?
Speaker C
Gladiator.
Speaker B
Did you kill last week?
Speaker D
No.
Speaker B
Did you try to kill last week?
Speaker D
Yeah.
Speaker B
Now listen, this is your last week of unemployment insurance.Either you kill somebody next week or we're going to have to change your status.You got it?
Speaker D
Yeah.
Speaker B
Signs?
A new applicant is questioned about being a stand-up philosopher, leading to a mock evaluation of his ability to 'bullshit.' The scene shifts when his agent arrives and identifies him as Comicus.
Speaker B
Next.Occupation?Stand up philosopher.What?
Speaker C
Stand up philosopher.
I coalesce the vapor of human experience into a viable and logical
Speaker B
comprehension.Oh, a bullshit artist.
Did you bullshit last week?
Speaker C
No.
Speaker B
Did you try to bullshit last week?Yes.Comicus.
Comicus.Comicus.Back in the line.Back in the line.He's
Speaker C
not in line.He's not in line.He's my agent.Swiftus.
The agent reveals he has secured a major job and tries to collect the money, sparking a brief argument. He then announces the exciting opportunity: performing in Caesar's Palace's main room, and urges them to hurry before the show starts.
Speaker B
Good news.I just got you a job.Now that you're working, you won't be needing this.
Speaker C
Wait a minute.That money is mine.
Speaker B
I'm sorry, I'm on my wine break,
Speaker A
Dopas.I don't have the money in my hand.Oh, I like that.I like that.I go out and bust my anus to get you a job and you're angry with me.
Boy, you are nuts.Nvts nuts.Okay, okay.What kind of a job is it?Just the best gig in all of Rome.A date that every stand up philosopher, including Socrates, would die for.Believe it or not, you are going to play Caesar's Palace.
Speaker C
The main room.
Speaker A
The main room.Groovous.
Come on, let's not be late.The show starts in an hour.
Speaker C
The main room.
Speaker A
The main room.The
Speaker C
main room.
Speaker A
10.